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The Father’s Love
by Baruch
© 1991 by C. Baruch
Author’s Preface
This is a small bit I did back about 1991. I had just been through a difficult time in my life, and part of the means through which healing came was through journalling. That is an exercise in simply listening in prayer to God’s voice, and writing down what comes. I received some beautiful words that way, straight from the Father’s heart to me. This book sort of evolved from that exercise (selections from the journalling are included in the appendix). A few parts of the book were directly ‘journalled’, and others sort of sum up the messages I received earlier. Also included is a teaching on fantasy vs. the real world, I had come up with a year or two earlier, which I felt at the time was applicable to the whole message. A few sections have also been reused and rehashed in others of my works since. The story of the Prodigal Son is now a cartoon feature. A few parts are not exactly what I would write now - especially regarding the giving of the Torah on Mt. Sinai, David’s kingship and the Temple, etc. (which I now believe to have a much greater purpose in God’s eternal plan) - but the underlying message is true non-the-less. I decided to include it all, with as little editing as possible - especially as it reminded me of my own need to ‘dig in’ to the Father’s love some more. Anyway - I hope it blesses someone...
Table of Contents
The Father’s Love
The Father loves His children. That is a simple fact, and yet so profound most have yet to realise it’s meaning. Like all children, we tend to take that love for granted, shrug our shoulders and say of course, I know that. Who Doesn’t? Every one knows for a fact that the Father loves them. The line, God loves you has been cheapened by having been repeated so many times and yet it has rarely been spoken from a deep inner knowledge that He does in fact love. He is love. If you knew even a small fraction of His true love for you, you would never worry again. It would give you such an inner satisfaction that it would change the direction of your life. God’s love for you includes so many things you have never thought of. He has plans to fulfil your every desire. He has so much for you that if you were to be told, you would shake your head and say no. It can’t be. It’s too good to be true. I am writing this for the benefit of new believers who have just come into knowing the Father. Also for those who have known the Lord longer, because you need to hear this just as badly. Also you preachers,because you need to hear this even if you’ve been preaching on this very subject. I’ve preached some of the most beautiful sermons on knowing the Father. Later I had further experiences with the Father that made me think, I didn’t know anything before. When I had preached the original messages I thought, this is beautiful. I know the father and it’s great! As far as I know, everyone who heard me must have thought I had a deep knowledge of the Father, because they heard me preaching on it. Then, when I had more revelation, my thoughts were, boy! I didn’t know anything before! I expect that soon I’ll have such an experience with the Father that I would be ashamed I presumed to write this book on the subject. This type of revelation doesn’t puff you up (unless it’s been a long time since you last had it). My reaction, when receiving this type of revelation is, this is so basic. Everyone else must know it already! I’m talking about a personal revelation into Christ, and the Father. There’s a different type of revelation also from the Holy Spirit. It’s more of a practical how to type of revelation. That’s the kind that teaches you how to exercise faith, and how to lay hands on the sick, etc. That is also good, but it can puff up if isn’t backed by the personal type of revelation I’ve been talking about. The one kind makes you an effective minister of the gospel. The other makes you holy. The one type is the kind we see on the forefront and has been abused and even made merchandise of. The other, that I’m talking about, is the type that is often lacking in many ministers who have abused their office. However, God is bringing it into the church on a mass scale in these last days. That is the kind of revelation you need. God has so much in store for you. If you only knew, you would never worry again. As His child, you are loved more than you will ever know, but God wants you to begin to know it more now than you’ve ever have before. No matter where you are in your Christian walk, you can still dig deeper into His love for you. The reason I said that He loves you more than you’ll ever know, is not because there’s a limit to how much we can know. Maybe with our brain there is, but not with our spirit. The reason I said that is because His love is infinite. It’s like travelling in outer space. No matter how fast your rocket ship is you’ll never reach the edge of space. Even in heaven we’ll still be learning more and more, and taking bigger and bigger steps. That’s the point. God wants you to just keep digging deeper and deeper into His love and comprehending it on a newer lever each day. If, as I said at the beginning of this chapter, the statement, God loves you, solicits no more response from you than, ‘Sure, I know that already’, then you haven’t been digging. You’re looking for something besides His love to satisfy you. Only His love will satisfy. God doesn’t want your response just to be yeah, I know, but ‘Oh! Praise the Lord! I do know that!’ You need to dig. You have to spend time with Him. Get closer to Him in worship. Come into contact with His love and your love for Him will grow stronger. You cannot know His love for you without just loving Him back. When lovers are together, they have ways of expressing their love to one another. They hug and kiss, and say, I love you. They like to spend long hours together. When it’s all over, they love each other even more than before. Worship is like that. When we worship the Father we say, I love you, and we find ways to express our love to Him. He also expresses His love to us. That makes us love Him even more. Sometimes He expresses it so that His love goes deeper into our heart than it has before. He lets us see more of it than we ever have. Sometimes, His love heals hurts that we’ve received in the past. You don’t always have to have a session with a specially anointed counsellor to receive inner healing. It can come as you spend time in worship and in the Word of God. Perfect love casts out all fear. Spend time with Him. Learn to receive His love. Don’t worry about time wasted. Every hour spent with Him is worth any number of hours in some other endeavour whether it’s education, or receiving counselling, or self improvement. Learn to receive. Don’t just pray away, but actively receive. He is anxious to give. That’s what being a father is all about. Fathers love to give to their children. As you learn the value of spending time with Him and learning to receive, things will happen that you never thought possible. You will begin naturally to do things you always wished you could do. Fears will dissolve. You’ll find new strength. These again are only side benefits. The main thing will be that you love the Lord more than anything. More than you ever thought it was possible to love.
Knowing the Value of Love
As with all father-son relationships, there is much learning to do. Some children want all the wrong things. They don’t know the value of the right things. Once they do though, they go for it with all their strength. We began by talking about how some people are passive about God’s love as if it’s an elementary subject. Their trouble is they haven’t learned the value of love. If they did, they’d chase after it with all their might. They’d dig deeper into God with all they have. They’d know that is what they’ve been spending all their energy trying to find, and they’d change their course. Instead, they’ve been spending their energy on other things —trying to please people, attempting to build financial security, doing good things to satisfy their conscience, trying to have a good time. Nothing seems to do it. They just don’t know that the Father’s love is the only thing that will fit into the void. We say that about non Christians, but it is also true of many believers. They don’t know the value of love because they weren’t properly exposed to it as children. In fact, nobody was exposed to love in a perfect way because nobodies parents were perfect. For some, love was a reward for being good. They grew up constantly trying to earn acceptance with people and with God. They have a hard time understanding that God’s love is unconditional. Others were shown little love at all so they don’t understand it. They have been unconsciously trying to fill the void with something else that they can understand, such as pleasure, or a sense of achievement. To get into position to begin to know God’s love is sometimes difficult. There is a mental block against it because we think that what we know about love is all there is to be known. Love is so nebulous, whereas the other things we’ve found to try to fill the void seem much more real. We’re just like the man blind from birth who can’t understand why some people appreciate art. The only difference is that most people don’t know they are blind. We’ve all built up our own world view based on what has become meaningful and real to us, such as status, belongings, worldly friendships, pleasure, etc. This is fantasy, because it not only assigns a false value to these things but it excludes many things that are quite real. Before you can really get to know God’s love, you must totally reject your fantasies and accept the truth. Fantasy is what keeps you from enjoying the Father’s love. The opposite of fantasy is truth.
Truth
Truth is a simple but profound element. It is the essence of the nature of God. Jesus himself once said, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life.’ He also was called ‘the Word.’ He tied the two together in His prayer to the father when he said ‘sanctify them through Your Truth; Your Word is Truth.’ We see throughout the Bible that God’s plan is for people to progress from ignorance into truth. It’s never God’s will for people to remain in ignorance. Sometimes ignorance may be an excuse for not choosing the right way, but where ever possible, God’s plan is always to cancel that excuse by bringing truth. Even where truth is simply available so as to be searched out but has not been announced, God holds people responsible for what they could have known, as he does the heathen in Romans 2 for the knowledge of a creator through observing the natural order. All it takes is a glimpse of truth and the ‘good old days’ of ‘blissful ignorance’ are forever gone. In man’s way of thinking, it may be better to be ignorant and thus have an excuse for not doing the right thing, but not so to God’s way of thinking. The Jews were seen as being blessed by having the law even if it meant not having an excuse for failure:
Rom 3:1,2 What advantage then has the Jew, or what is the profit of circumcision? Much in every way! Chiefly because to them were committed the oracles of God.
Part of Jesus’ ministry was to make sure people knew where they stood. He saw to it that any excuse was cancelled:
John 15:22-24 If I had not come and spoken to them, they would have no sin, but now they have no excuse for their sin. He who hates Me hates My Father also. If I had not done among them the works which no one else did, they would have no sin; but now they have seen and also hated both Me and My Father.
Of course, it is not our job just to ‘inform and let die,’ but to use every means to actually win them over as Jesus did. They not only heard his words but also saw his works. God’s glory was boldly announced and demonstrated in their presence —not just explained. This is God’s ultimate plan as we see in Hab 2:14:
For the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the LORD, as the waters cover the sea.
Truth in the Bible sense is not simply facts regarding something or other. The Greek word for truth actually has a three-fold meaning: 1) factual truth (as opposed to a falsehood), 2) sincerity (as opposed to hypocrisy), and 3) the truth of God’s Word. The word truth as Jesus used it carried the full three-fold meaning. It meant the ultimate truth. Scientists may be looking for what they call truth - meaning facts regarding the origin of the universe, but they fall short if they fail to realise the Truth - who created the universe; why He created the universe; what is His plan for them personally. Jesus is the truth in the full three-fold sense of the word. That is why he had to deal not only with the publicans and sinners and ignorant fishermen, but also with the Pharisees and religious leaders. The Pharisees were actually very close to the truth in the sense of being scriptural. They would pass for good evangelical and Pentecostal Christians of today as far as that was concerned. However, they and the other religious leaders were slaves of their fantasies, and Jesus had to both speak out and back up what he said with signs following so they would be without excuse. It was necessary to blow their fantasies so that they could see clearly to choose the way of truth - or else clearly reject it, which they did: The crucifixion was not done in ignorance. Jesus was not put to death by accident. It was man’s clear choice to reject God, and the man who was clearly revealed to be their messiah. The High Priest for that year even prophesied, ‘One man must die for the people.’ The religious leaders knew that to accept the messiah might mean risking their position to a Roman clamp-down on insurrection. So they disowned their King by laying the iniquity of insurrection on Him by declaring to Pontius Pilate, ‘We have no king but Caesar ... if you let this man go, you are no friend of Caesar.’ This whole drama is unfolded for us in the gospel of John. The people at that time were at a point of revolt. Jesus was the focus of that revolt. The religious leaders decided that the iniquity of the people had to be lain on Jesus, their messiah, if their nation was to be saved. In so doing the consequences of their rebellious tendencies were put off for about 40 years. The only point on which the leaders were ignorant was the scale on which the act took place: it was not simply for the insurrection of a nation at a particular point in time against the Roman government, but for the insurrection of the whole human race against the Creator. This is not just a nice story. It is something that actually happened about 2000 years ago. It had to happen, because the problems that had to be dealt with are real. The concept of sin is not just a made up fantasy, but a real problem. Therefore the solution had to be a real solution. Because Jesus in truth died, and rose from the dead, we can now be free from sin and death and fantasy. The crucifixion was the ultimate confrontation between truth and the absolute rejection of truth. Truth was nailed to a cross, and derided, mocked and spat upon. Finally, Truth died, and fantasy, lies, hypocrisy and utter rejection of the biblical promise rejoiced in momentary victory. Three days later Truth arose in ultimate victory over death and lies and fantasy forever.
Three Worlds
Lets look again at truth in contrast with the self-made world-view people have, that we described earlier as a fantasy world. If we look at truth in relationship to the fantasy world, we can rename it for our purposes ‘the real world.’ As a world, truth has two hemispheres: the natural cause-effect world, and the supernatural world. The natural cause-effect world-view is a world based on laws and absolutes such as the law of gravity, the law of sowing and reaping, and many more. Some of them are at work and affect our lives whether we know it or not. It is the world where one accepts facts regardless of how much they may hurt. There, one is willing to do things right from the start and reap proper results rather than take short-cuts. It is not a particularly attractive place to live. That’s why so many would rather stay in a fantasy world. If it weren’t for the supernatural world, the real world would be an extremely difficult place to remain for very long. It takes strength of character to live in the Natural Cause-effect world. The supernatural world is part of the real world. It is inseparably linked with the natural world because it too is involved with the law of sowing and reaping. Contrary to what many think, it does not ignore the natural forces. Rather it acts within the natural world as one of its forces. It can override the other forces only when certain conditions are met. Like the natural world, there are laws that apply. Only in the fantasy world are there no fixed laws (unless they are arbitrary or self imposed). That’s why it is impossible to exit the fantasy world directly into the supernatural. By attempting to do so, you only embrace a new fantasy. (Even occult experience is fantasy mixed with supernatural of the wrong kind.) It is possible only to embrace the supernatural world-view from a solid acceptance of the natural world-view.
Isaiah 6.9-10 ...He said, “Go, and tell this people: ‘Keep on hearing, but do not understand; Keep on seeing, but do not perceive. Make the heart of this people dull, and their ears heavy, and shut their eyes; lest they see [the truth] with their eyes, and hear [the truth] with their ears, and understand [the truth] with their heart, And return and be [supernaturally] healed.”
Here we see there is just one way one can enter the supernatural. It’s only when one can hear and accept the truth that they can convert and be healed (or receive the supernatural). Now let us look in detail at the fantasy world. In doing so, we will understand the natural world and supernatural world better by contrast. The fantasy world encompasses anything that isn’t so, but what one accepts as fact. This may be because it was taught that it’s so, they assume it to be so, they wanted to believe that it’s so, they were driven by fear to believe it’s so, or were lead by any other illusive evidence. Most people adopt this world view at least to some extant in one area of their life or another. A simple example: When people look into a mirror they usually manage to put on the facial expression that suits them. As long as they are in front of the mirror they look their best - relaxed, with a winning smile, sparkling eyes. Then they go away with the impression that that is how every one else sees them. However, they don’t remember to carry that winning expression on their face all day. They usually forget and start being themselves. When they see a snapshot of them self their first reaction is, ‘Oh dear, I look terrible! That’s a bad shot. It’s not a reflection of the real ‘me!’’ Everyone else thinks (but are perhaps too polite to say), ‘That’s how you always looks to me.’ This of course is a mild example of a fantasy, but one that I believe we can all relate to. There are other fantasies that are much more serious in their consequences. Many people’s minds are moulded by what they see on television, or at the cinema, the newspaper, and other types of media. Their understanding of right and wrong, and even their sense of logic is formed - not by natural cause-effect, but by an artificial universe created by script writers and journalists. They are in a media fantasy. Let’s look in detail at two more types of fantasy that are even more subtle, because they masquerade as natural and supernatural world views: The first kind, we can call hyper-fantasy. For the Christian, this one can be easily mistaken for supernatural. Hyper fantasisers are usually ‘possibility thinkers.’ To the hyper-fantisiser, the teaching received from the Word of God is treated much the same as a ‘get-rich-quick’ scheme. They enthusiastically hear the Word of God concerning promise of a better life, but they fail to focus on the object of those promises. That’s to bring them into a closer relationship with their Father. This makes Him sad. This fantasy is not restricted to the object of material gain. It can be anything that would arouse excitement, glamour, or the exultation of ones self (looking super-spiritual) without having to humble oneself before the Father. They only hear the Word half way, and fail to apply the other half. This is what Paul warned Timothy would happen:
II Timothy 4.3-4 ...the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth, and be turned aside to fables.
When the world of the hyper-fantasiser finally caves in and he has finally ‘learned his lesson,’ he doesn’t necessarily embrace the natural world-view. Often he goes for yet another fantasy: the down2earth fantasy. A down2earth (or D2E) fantasy is often mistaken for the natural cause-effect world- view. It says that nothing extraordinary will happen that hasn’t happened already. That is, nothing will happen to dramatically alter the status quo. However, they may never verbalise it, or even be conscious of believing it. On the surface they appear to believe quite firmly in things like the second coming, that God answers prayer, and in the ultimate downfall of the hyper fantasiser. However, some things are believed on in the head but never acted on. In reality, they are not really believed in at all. Faith without works is dead. D2E fantasisers generally have a natural aversion to hyper- fantasisers and their tendency to expect something for nothing. Their typical response to a highly positive message would be ‘that’s just too good to be true.’ Chronic mediocrity has set in due to never allowing expectations to rise beyond past experience. Sometimes this attitude is mistaken for deep spirituality. That’s why we often see attempts at correcting the extremes of the hyper fantasiser by giving council from a down2earth perspective. If anything, it only moves the counsellee into a more subtle fantasy than before. Related to the down2earth fantasy, but not so down 2 earth - in fact, a cross between D2E and hyper - is what we could call the wysiwyg fantasy. That’s a computer term meaning ‘What You See Is What You Get;’ or to be more accurate in our case, ‘what you’ve seen is what you’ll get.’ The wysiwyg fantasy would characterise those living dangerously or enjoying ‘life in the fast lane.’ This can be in regard to driving habits, night life, business practices, family relationship, sexual promiscuity, drug and alcohol abuse, other personal habits, etc. It also accounts for many people dying without leaving a will or failure to buy insurance. It is really the same attitude that affects the down2earth fantasiser because they lack the ability to foresee anything that isn’t typical of their past experience. Death has never happened to them before, so they live like it never will. No serious motor accident has ever occurred, so they drive as if they are immune. Because the wysiwyg fantasy shares in common with the hyper fantasy the fact they are both on the overly optimistic end of the scale (where D2E occupies the overly pessimistic end), let’s simplify matters by simply referring to both as hyper/wysiwyg - less terminology to remember.
How Fantasies Keep Us From the Father’s Love
Because of the common blind spot, we often find wysiwyg and D2E fantasisers in the same family. Sometimes, if the parents are down2earth, some of the children will be hyper/wysiwyg. Jesus once told a story of a family where the older brother was D2E and the younger went on a hyper/wysiwyg fantasy. This story illustrates the heart of the father in His love for us, and how fantasies keep us from receiving His love. The younger son just loved the thought that he had an abundant inheritance. His father loved his sons very much, and wanted nothing more than to give them things. He had probably told them, ‘see all this property? See the camels? The sheep? The money in the bank? All this is yours. On this property are a thousand hills, and I own the cattle that you see grazing on every one of them. All that is yours!’ There was just one thing that made the father a little sad. While the younger son took great delight in what was his by inheritance, he seemed to take his dad just a little bit for granted. The other son? He was a good boy and never made any trouble —but there was something about him too that made father wonder a little. Well, one day the younger son decided to exercise his rights as a son. He said, ‘Well, Dad, I think I’ll just take my share of the inheritance right now and convert it into hard currency. I’ll show you what I can make of myself.’ So, he liquidated his assets (his 500 hills), went off to a far country, and became a yuppie. Now, he was on a hyper/wysiwyg roll! It looked like there was no end to the money he had, and it looked like things would continue looking up. He was comfortable and fine. He didn’t need his father’s love. At least he didn’t think so, but his father knew he did. This made him all the more sad. He wasn’t only sad at the loss of his son, but more so over his son’s loss of Him. His other son couldn’t quite believe his dad had actually given his brother all that inheritance. There must have been foul play somewhere. Surely Dad isn’t that generous - or is ‘foolish’ the word? There was something about this older son that also made the father uneasy. The father wanted so much to express his love, but it seemed like there just was no way to do it. The boy seemed so satisfied in his little corner of the house, faithfully slaving away in the fields every day, eating a moderate portion of the food at the great table, staying a little while but not too long at the garden parties his dad threw. It was hard to tell what went through his mind. He was so close, yet out of reach. Oh, he was always consulting with his dad, but it was always something like, ‘How about if we move the goats into the North forty and the cows back to Hill number 66?’ He was a great guy to have working for you, but every time Dad asked him ‘is there anything I can give you? Remember, everything you see is yours.’ The son would only reply, ‘No, that’s okay.’ ‘Then why not take the rest of the day off and join me at the health club?’ Dad would ask. ‘I can’t,’ He’d reply. Usually there was some reason like, ‘I’ve got to get the paper work finished before the camel caravan leaves next week.’ Finally, the other son’s luck ran out. Things began to happen that he just hadn’t foreseen. Oil prices went sky high. The price of frozen pork-bellies collapsed. Unfortunately, all the younger son’s investment funds were tied up in frozen pork-bellies. His broker called to tell him he had to bring the rest of his money or liquidate his position. ‘The price is sure to rebound soon, and you’ll get it all back,’ his broker told him. The price didn’t rebound, and the younger son lost all his money. ‘Too bad’, said the broker as he collected his commission fee. So the poor yuppie had to find a job. As there was a recession on, jobs were hard to find. The only place that would give him some work and a meagre salary was the pork-belly farm. As pork-belly prices were depressed, there wasn’t much money to be had. Now his own belly was giving him problems because his pay cheque was three weeks behind. The only food he could find to put into his own belly was suppose to be going into the pork-bellies, which he understandably wasn’t too keen to accommodate because the pork-bellies had already let him down so badly. Finally, as he was trying to sneak in a few bites of the rotten left-over food, the bible says, he came to himself. He trashed his fantasy and came to reality. Until that happened no miracle could happen. It would be utterly impossible. All the miracles promise by his fantasies had failed. Only by making the move into the real world, can one take a further step into the supernatural world. The first step is called repentance. The second is faith. In the Bible we see the phrase repeatedly, ‘repent and believe.’ We never see it in reverse order. It’s always repent and accept the truth, and then believe and receive the supernatural. To do otherwise is only embracing another fantasy. The younger son could have thought, ‘maybe my dad will send the chauffeur in the limousine out to find me and hand me a big cheque.’ But he didn’t. He made his way back to his father’s house on foot, and began to tell his dad the truth. This was the moment Dad had been waiting for for a long long time. Even since before the son had left home. Finally, his son was coming to him in truth. He was being himself before his Father. He was pouring out his all. He wasn’t being ‘Mr. Big Shot Highroller’ anymore. He wasn’t ‘Mr. Cool.’ He was just plain ‘me.’ One of the things I had to do before I could begin to experience the Father’s love in a deeper way, was realise that God doesn’t love ‘Missionary-Baruch.’ He doesn’t love ‘Clever-Bible-teacher-Baruch.’ He doesn’t even love ‘Apostle-Baruch,’ or ‘Baruch-with-oh!-so-much- potential.’ But he has a tremendously profound deep and massive love for just ‘Baruch’. To receive that love I must come to him as just that. Just me. The others are only tools He has provided to do his work. Of course I’m part of His plan. So are you. But what’s infinitely more important, you and I are a part of HIM. That is where His love for us lies. The younger son came back to his father as just himself. Finally, for the first time in his life, he was in a position to really receive. He was happy. His father was happy because now for the first time, he could really be a father. The father-son relationship that the father had wanted for so long, and the son now knew was the thing he had really been searching for, was now beginning to blossom. Not only that but there were a few side benefits as well. A pair of shoes, signifying full membership in the family as a son —not a slave. A robe, signifying honoured status, and the ring bearing the family seal entitling him to make transactions with the family assets. The parable of Jesus doesn’t say whether the father had managed to get the other 500 hills back, but with our Heavenly Father, we know that half of infinity is still infinity, and we also know because of the ring, that the younger son was back into his inheritance. The older son just couldn’t handle this. He had been a good boy all his life. He hadn’t run off with his father’s fortunes. He hadn’t even asked for anything much or been any trouble at all! Now this erratic so- and-so who had given the family such a bad name and squandered the family money comes back and what does Dad do? He’s acting like a total fool! The problem was that the older son couldn’t understand receiving. He never understood his father’s heart at all. In fact, he never understood his own role as a son. He was still making the same mistake his younger brother had made at the beginning. His focus was on the value of the property, and not on the very person and nature of his father.
Institutions
When Jesus told the parable of the prodigal son he was speaking to the religious leaders of his day. They were acting just like the older son in the story. They were proud of the system they represented —the one given to them by Moses. All Moses had done was receive the truth from God and give it to the people. Moses hadn’t only spoken truth, but he pointed his finger in the direction of the one who is truth. The religious leaders didn’t look in the direction Moses’ finger pointed. They just looked at Moses’ finger. Moses would have rejoiced to have met Jesus. He would have been saddened to see his professed followers rejecting the truth. Moses had seen the people of his day reject the truth. He had seen God try to get as close to the people as He possibly could. Because man had sold himself under sin, he could only get so close. Moses had got as close to God as a man possibly could, and had even seen the back side of God. It was wonderful! Moses loved nothing more than to get up close to God. The Bible says that Moses was one of the humblest men on the face of the earth (Numbers 12.3). That means he had no fantasies. When there are no fantasies, you can know the value of love. Nothing prevents you from receiving, and the more you receive, the more you want. Moses was like that. He just loved to spend 40 days at a time in God’s presence drinking in His glory and absorbing His very character. He tried to get the people up close to God, but they couldn’t stand it. God spoke to the people out of Mount Sinai, and they just couldn’t take that. Later, after Moses had seen the back side of God, they couldn’t even stand to look at Moses! They just said to him, ‘Look, you go and listen to God, and then come and tell us what He said, and we’ll do it.’ They were settling for a second-hand religion. That’s all that their fantasies would settle for. Since God is a giving God, He gave them what they wanted; a religion where they had to go through the priests, and obey all kinds of laws. He gave them the Levitical system, and the Law. Of course, being the Father that He was, He gave them the best. The system of Laws he gave them were far advanced from anything seen at that time. They’re still the basis for many of the laws in our courts today. Later they wanted a king. They had their Levitical system, and the tabernacle made of badger skin. God anointed special leaders to fight their battles, and rule them with His wisdom and the excellent laws He had given them. That was really the best set up there could be. The leaders God picked were anointed and loved God and served the people in the fear of God. On the other hand, the people saw that all the other nations had kings. They thought that everyone else was looking down on them, and saw them as an under- developed country ruled by tribal chiefs. The fact that the ‘primitive tribesmen’ had a God that no one could match, that defeated the Egyptians (the super-power of that day) didn’t seem to mean very much to them. Neither did the fact that they had annihilated countless kings and their fancy up-to-date kingdoms and high-tech armies; or that they had such an advanced law system. However, God again gave in to them. Being a giving Father, He gave them two of the greatest kings the world has ever seen, David and Solomon. Later still they wanted a nice temple instead of a tabernacle made of badger skin. Again God protested, saying, ‘I don’t live in a temple made with hands.’ He was trying all along to keep things as simple as possible, but the people kept wanting to build institutions. (Of course, David originated the idea of a temple out of good intentions, but then he was just being a good king.) God again gave in to His Fatherly nature. He ordered one of the best, most beautiful and expensive temples that have ever been built. The thing about institutions is that they provide an easy hiding place for fantasies. That’s why they’re so attractive. This has happened over and over. Many revival movements begun by the Holy Spirit started at the grass roots. They were like people listening directly to God at the foot of the mountain. Then later they looked at the ‘nations around them’ and wanted to be like them. That’s how denominations get started. Later they got so dry and far from the Father’s love that the Father had to send the Holy Spirit to start a fresh revival. Once an institution has been started, it becomes part of God’s authority structure. Once God has given in to our demands for a priestly system, there’s no more gathering at the foot of the mountain. When the people got their king, there was no recourse to the anointed judges. God didn’t anoint any more judges. The only new leaders were the sons of the previous kings. If he new king happened to be good, then fine. If not, there was trouble, but the people just had to put up with it. That was the system that God recognised, although he did send His prophets from time to time to warn the kings. Even Jesus recognised the temple in Jerusalem as ‘God’s house’ - as corrupt as its religious leaders were. Sometimes he seemed downright fanatical about preserving it’s sanctity as he chased out the money changers and thieves. However, he did prophecy that the temple would be totally destroyed. That was God’s doing. God never commissions a man to go about dismantling institutions. If an institution or denomination is on a shaky foundation it will fall all by its self. Meanwhile, it is part of God’s authority structure and woe to the one who would try to pull it down. Some fantasisers think it is their job to tear down the institutions. They are usually hyper fantasisers who think they are called to be prophets. Sometimes God does have a prophetic anointing waiting for them, but they can’t hear what God is saying because of their fantasy. What makes God sad is that they are missing out on fellowship with the Father, and are destroying other people’s lives, and will themselves be destroyed. Then, there are the fantasisers who are hiding within the institutions. They think their job is to preserve their institution at all cost. In many cases, the only opportunity they will have to break away from their fantasies will be when the bad foundations finally give way, and their institution collapses. Finally, there are those who have broken free of their fantasies. They have found the truth. They are not out tearing down institutions or frantically trying to preserve them. They are simply being obedient to the Father’s voice. When the institutions do collapse, they’ll be the ones that will bring healing to the hurt and wounded, and show the way into the presence of the Father.
The Voice of Truth
These people know what it is to rest. They’ve been into the presence of the Father, so they are at peace. Being with the Father has dispelled all fears. They know that all they have to do is listen for that still small voice. When that voice comes it will be just the right thing for what they need. They know they are safe when hard times come. They’ve heard the voice and obeyed it. The reason that they can hear it so clearly is because they have no fantasies to confuse them. Some people are always saying, ‘God told me this, God told me that,’ when God didn’t tell them anything. Then, when He did tell them something, they didn’t hear. What they heard was their fantasies. Sometimes they do know deep down inside what God has really been saying. Because it was something they didn’t want to hear, they either ignored it, or else found a way to interpret it differently, or decided it wasn’t from God. Some fantasisers are quite skilful at this. They may get what they want now, but in the end they’ll be destroyed. One time when I was in the investment market the Lord began showing me I was to pull out. The way He did it was have me turn to the place in the Bible where King Amaziah had hired some mercenary troops from the kingdom to the North for 100 Talents. A prophet came and told him that God wouldn’t bless him with those men working for him —that he should get rid of them. King Amaziah said, ‘What shall I do about the 100 Talents I gave them?’ The prophet said, ‘God is able to give you much more than this.’ I felt this was speaking to me, but I couldn’t understand it. In some of my previous investment positions, I felt like God had given me guidelines how the price was going to fluctuate. Then I turned to another portion, and there was the story of King Ahab and King Jehoshaphat consulting the prophets whether they should go up to fight at Ramoth Gilead. All the prophets said, ‘Go up and fight, for the Lord has given it into your hand.’ One prophet named Micaiah came and said, ‘I saw the Lord with all His hosts before Him. He asked, ‘Who will go and cause Ahab to go and fall at Ramoth Gilead?’ Some answered this and some answered that. Finally one spirit stood up and said, ‘I will.’ God asked, ‘How will you do this?’ The spirit answered, ‘By becoming a deceiving spirit in the mouth of all his prophets.’’ I thought about it a long time. Because I really wanted to make those investments, I somehow found a different way to interpret the Words I received. What I ended up doing was changing broker agencies when I should have pulled out altogether. I ended up in some severe financial difficulty. I had followed my greedy fantasy just as King Ahab had done. Fortunately I didn’t die in the battle like he did. If you want to do a case study of fantasies, look at the life of King Ahab. There is more detail about him than any other king of the Northern tribes of Israel. He was an interesting person, but you study about him on your own. However, his final episode was a true test of whether one is in a fantasy or following truth. He had many voices to select from. Most of them were saying what he wanted to hear. Only one was speaking for God. The voice he picked showed what he was, and also determined his destiny. Just because you can find other voices that agree with you doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for disaster. Sometimes there is only one voice that is speaking God’s truth. The trouble is, many prophets have a prophetic anointing for fantasy. Somehow, they are able to pick up what a person’s fantasy wants and even prophecy supernaturally to those fleshly desires. Because they themselves are moving in fantasy, they are susceptible to this kind of activity. Micaiah was the only prophet among that group before King Ahab that wasn’t controlled by fantasies. At first he wasn’t invited. When King Jehoshaphat heard all those positive words, it sounded good. It was like a giant praise rally with 400 prophets all prophesying. One of them even did an inspiring drama presentation with horns of iron he had made. The atmosphere there was electric. Such anointing! Such unity! Who could doubt that it was God’s will to go and do battle at Ramoth Gilead? However, Jehoshaphat was a little troubled in his spirit. He asked King Ahab, ‘Isn’t there another prophet of the Lord whom we can inquire?’ That’s when Ahab told him about Micaiah. ‘But I don’t like him,’ he said. ‘He’s always prophesying bad things about me.’ When someone went to fetch him they told him, ‘All the prophets have given positive Words. You just flow with the spirit and confirm what they say. Don’t ruin the atmosphere.’ Micaiah answered, ‘As the Lord lives, what the Lord tells me, I will speak.’ Micaiah wasn’t deceived by the electric atmosphere of the ‘camp meeting.’ He was determined to speak only the voice of God. When he spoke the truth, it offended people. Ahab had him locked up. It even offended the other preachers, especially the one who gave the word about the horns. He slapped Micaiah in the face and said, ‘Since when does the Holy Spirit speak only to you, and not to the rest of us?’ (At least that’s how some modern day preachers would have said it.) Micaiah was committed to the truth. It didn’t matter if he was a ‘party pooper,’ or that it made him unpopular. He was a man of truth. Even though his ‘check in the spirit’ prompted them to get the additional witness of Micaiah, Jehoshaphat was still swayed by the appearance of unity and the ‘electric atmosphere.’ Or perhaps he also was offended by the way Micaiah stood for the truth. Deep inside there was also the fear of man. Had he himself stood firm on the truth instead of fearing the people, he could have saved himself a lot of trouble, and possibly his friend Ahab’s life. He took the easy way out and followed the crowd of fantasisers. So how do we know the truth from a fantasy? If you have known the Father and have been studying His Word, sometimes you’ll get a check in the spirit like King Jehoshaphat did. Sometimes it is necessary to spend time before the Father until His presence can be felt above the all the other voices screaming inside your head. The more time you spend in the Father’s presence regularly every day, the more you’ll love just to be with him. When you know His love in a deep way, it will overcome the desire to be accepted by the in- crowd. Then go the way of love, not the way of fear or of greed. Ahab was motivated by greed and Jehoshaphat by fear of man. Only Micaiah was motivated by love - love for the truth; love for Ahab. Fear and greed are like ditches on either side of the road. If you move straight ahead in the way of love and faith, you will remain in truth. If you are drawn by greed, you will land in the ditch of greed on the one side of the road. If you move in fear, you will land in the other ditch. Some people travel a zigzag path getting stuck in one ditch, then pulling themselves free only to land in the opposite ditch. Others get stuck in one simply out of avoiding the other. By spending time with the Father and in the Word of God, you can learn to know love and faith, and recognise the ditches of fear and greed.
Receive
Spending time with the Father is the key. He loves for you to come before him and just bask in His presence. He looks forward to every time you come to Him. He has so much to give, but you need to recognise your utter dependence on Him. Look to Him for your strength and all your resources. He is a giving God and desires so much to give to you and supply all your needs. Be like the younger son who came home to his father. Just open up, be yourself before God, and receive. The way of receiving is not the way of greed. That was the younger son’s first notion. The way of receiving is embracing the father, coming as ‘just me,’ emptying ourselves of all other images of ourselves, and acknowledging our total dependence on Him. That’s the only way to receive. That is what we need to sustain our daily lives. It is as essential to our overall well being as eating and drinking is to our body. It is our key to survival in the days to come. receive from the Father. Learning to receive is of imperative importance to us today. That’s why the message in this book is so important. We need to move to a new level in our relationship with the Father if we are to be used in the harvest that is to come. It is imperative that we daily dig deeper into the Father and learn to receive on a new level every day. The blockages —the fantasies, the fears— all must go. This book is a message from the Heavenly Father. In some parts the pronouns could have been switched so as to be the Father speaking because they were received directly from Him. I believe the words made your heart burn within you just the same. The message of this book is the message of the hour. Learn to receive. It is only when we’ve learned to receive from the Father that we will have to give to people in need in the time that is approaching. It doesn’t matter if you are a ‘full time minister,’ or simply a believer. God is going to use you in ways you never dreamed of. That is not just a nice thing to say to get you excited. The times that are approaching are going to require you to be used in ways you never dreamed possible. For that, you must begin now to receive. Dig in to the Father’s love. Start by worshipping in His presence and saying, ‘I receive, I receive.’ Soon He will teach you new ways to receive. If you have a fantasy, get rid of it right now as you fall down in worship. Believe me, there will be no room for your fantasy in the times that are approaching. It’s going to come crashing down, and besides, you’re not really happy in it anyway. You will be so much happier knowing the Father in a way you never have before —even if it does seem like taking a giant step backwards. Then again, that’s just what Jesus said. ‘Unless you humble yourself and become as a child, you are not worthy of the Kingdom of God.’
Becoming as a Child
The thing about children is they know how to receive. There are no preconditions. They just receive. Even though at this writing I have not married, I have fostered a child. I know what it is like to be a father. I learned that the expense of a gift means nothing to a young child. If I went on a trip and I saw something cheap but interesting, it would often mean just as much to the child as something fancy or expensive. I once bought her some little stickers that were like coloured plastic gems. She stuck them on everything. They were on her school bag, her computer game diskette, her school note books and even on some of my things. The next time I found some pencils that had erasers that looked like water tap. Another time, a fancy pencil box that looked like a giant pencil. I bought these things for her because I loved her. I would have felt hurt if she had turned them down. She didn’t. She received them joyfully and loved me all the more. That made me want to buy her something more expensive. Some children aren’t like that. They want only the fancy things they see advertised on TV, or the expensive toys their friends have. Jesus wasn’t talking about those kind of children. They live in a media fantasy. They have lost their child-likeness. It is not such a great joy to give to children like that. We were fortunate that we didn’t live in a high consumer society, so it was easier for me to help my child to avoid that. When a child knows how to receive, it is a joy to give to them. When they love the giver of the toys more than the toys, then the giver wants more than ever to give them something fancy and expensive. The secret to receiving is to come to the father as a child. When Jesus said, ‘you must come as a child,’ his disciples had been arguing about who would be the greatest in the kingdom of God. That’s what grown-ups argue about. They spend all of their time just thinking about questions like, ‘What do people think about me?’ ‘What can I say to make people realise how spiritual I am?’ ‘How many preaching invitations can I get?’ ‘What would it do for my image if I did such-n-such?’ ‘How much fame and glory will I get from writing this book?’ Those thoughts always come. How do we get rid of them? Do we just try to block them out of our mind? That’s nearly impossible. The secret is to give up trying to act like a grown-up at all, and come to the father as a child like Jesus said. That’s what worship is all about. Just come to Him and say, ‘Father, I love you more than all that. Just being with you is all I need. Walking with you is all the satisfaction I want. I love you more than any thing you could ever give me.’ Picture yourself as a child being picked up and carried by Him. Pray as the Holy Spirit gives you words to pray both in the language you know and in your prayer language. Let the words come out of your heart to the Father. Do that until you have the sense of His presence. Then, receive Him as the answer to all your wants. You ought to be doing this every day. As you sense His presence, receive that presence into those parts of you that thought you had to have something else. God often plans to give you those other things (provided they aren’t sinful, unhealthy or unscriptural), but you must die to them so that you can fully receive His love into your being. When His love penetrates those areas, you’ll find a satisfaction you’ve never known before. Only then you’ll know what you really want. While I was learning to receive His love, I was reminiscing about my past. I thought of the time when I was a Bible school student. A lady from out of town was visiting the campus to see one of her relatives who was also a student. She was behind me in the cafeteria line. Something made me think that a little trick with a pen would mean something to her, so on impulse I did it for her. I said, ‘Look at this.’ It was really a silly notion. She must have thought, ‘what is this guy trying to do?’ When I thought about it afterwards, I was terribly embarrassed, especially since I was one of the older students who should have appeared more mature. Even now, years later as I was reminiscing, the embarrassment came back. It was one of those memories that I always tried to keep as far from me as possible. This time as it came to my mind, I decided not to push the memory away, but to receive the Fathers love in worship at the same time. Receiving His love in light of that event helped me to fathom that love in a deeper way. I received His love into that part of me that felt it need to be respected as a mature adult. That part of me began to realise that the Father’s love is more than sufficient. There are many parts of our subconscious mind that have been conditioned by our past. We are usually not aware of those factors, so we desire certain things or fear certain things without really knowing why. I once read a story about a woman and her cat. Every time she came home from work, she’d open the refrigerator to get the cat-food. The cat would sit directly in front of the refrigerator door so that its face would be hit as it opened. Then the cat would stand with its head directly over the cat-food bowl so that the food would land on its head as the woman tried to pour the food into the bowl. This happened every single time for years —ever since it was a kitten. She wondered, ‘Why is this cat so stupid? You would think it would learn by now!’ We often ask that same question about ourselves. Later, she realised that it was herself who had conditioned the cat that way. The cat had simply fallen into a pattern and she had reinforced it by rewarding the cat with its dinner. The cat believed that to get its food, it must stand in front of the refrigerator like so, until the door hit its face, then stand over the cat bowl like so, until the food landed on its head. It worked every time! The dinner always came that way, so that must the way to receive dinner. No one had ever forcefully demonstrated to the cat that it could still get its food even if it didn’t go through all that. The woman had trained her cat without knowing it. The way to reward a cat is with food. With humans, the ultimate prize is love. However, often we’ve been conditioned to accept substitutes such as acceptance with other people, respect or even pleasure. These can often carry a higher value in our minds than love, simply because we haven’t had the experience of receiving unconditional love on a consistent basis. That is why people are looking for respect from others when they should be seeking to receive more of God’s love. Fear comes when anything appears to threaten that respect or sense of pleasure or whatever else it might be. That’s why it was so painful to me when I made a fool of myself in front of that lady. I thought she could no longer respect me as a mature adult who had been on the mission field and was an honour student in that institution. That respect was important to me. When I received the Father’s love I began to know first hand that that love is so much more valuable than any respect that lady could have had for me. He doesn’t care if I was a missionary or a top student. It would make no difference to Him if I had been a burglar or a drug addict just the day before, or was from the loony asylum. God is crazy about me. The creator of the universe thinks I’m the greatest just because I’m His child. He thinks the same about you too. The Father’s love for you is infinitely more important than any status symbol, title, or achievement, whether it be PhD, CEO, Mr. President, Rev, Pope, king, national hero, or martyr for the faith. The only difference is knowing it. By worshipping Him, we can begin to know that love in a deeper and more vivid way. That knowledge will grow. The fear of losing our sense of acceptance or our respectability, will dissolve. The dread that our source of security may soon collapse, will just go away. Perfect love casts out all fear. Titles and status symbols don’t affect children like they do grown-ups. They know how to receive. They know where to find love. They don’t know yet about all the fancy grandiose alternatives that are available. They don’t try to be ‘something’ so as to gain your respect because they know that love is unconditional —that is until a grown-up offends them. To offend a child means to demonstrate to them that something else is really more valuable then love. Jesus said (in effect), ‘Woe to anyone who offends one of these little ones.’ When little ones are offended it distorts their understanding of love. They are disillusioned. They start looking for substitutes. The trouble is, many times the substitutes for love that the child finds may seem to be more satisfying than all the genuine love the child has seen so far. Maybe the parent’s love is conditional, and the child has to prove he is worthy of it. Maybe the parent’s love is unobtainable, so the child has to look somewhere else. The parent really loves the child but perhaps didn’t show that love when the child most needed it. The parent soon wonders, ‘What’s wrong with my child?’ What’s wrong is the child has been trained just like the cat. The lady had unwittingly taught her cat that it had to let the refrigerator door bang in its face, and then let the food land on its head before it could receive its dinner. By offending the child, the parent has unwittingly taught the child that other things are really more valuable than love, or that he or she has to do all kinds of crazy things before he can be happy. Perhaps you are a child who has lost his or her childhood through such an offence. I’m talking to old ‘children’ as well as young. Go to the Father and worship Him. If you need to, bring that offence to Him, and let Him demonstrate to you in a real way, that Love really is the most valuable commodity around. Go to Him as a child and let Him be a Father to you again. He loves you and is really looking forward to having a nice long chat with you.
Apendex
Selections From the Author's Journal From July 1991 to January 1992
Journelling is an exercise in listening to the Holy Spirit while writing down what one hears. It's a bit like prophecy in as much as prophecy is used in it's purpose to build up, exhort and to comfort (I Cor 14:3). At that point in my life I needed just that, and as you will see below, that's basically the gist of what came out. A natural question on the part of many will be, "Is this of God?" "How would one know if one isn't getting into something 'funny'?" Three factors should be of help: 1. The ultimate test would be in the fruit that comes out. If it does exactly what I Corinthians 14:3 says, in other words, if it builds you up in Jesus, exhorts and comforts, that's a good sign. Two chapters before that (12:3), Paul says, no one speaking by the Spirit of God calls Jesus accursed, and no one can say that Jesus is Lord except by the Holy Spirit. If it lifts up Jesus, and reaffirms His Lordship, both doctrinally, and practically (ie. Lord of your life and situation), that's also a good sign. I John 4:1 is also applicable. 2. A second test would be motive. If you are simply hungry for the Lord, and want more of Him, then according to what Jesus said in Luke 11:11-13, that's what you will receive: If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish? Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him! Now, even if journalling weren't a scriptural thing to do, according to the verse quoted above, would God, being a loving Father, say, "I know you're asking from a hungry heart, but I never said you could do that. Here, take some demonic deception instead! That'll teach you!" That's not the Father's character. If your motive is at least pure, then the worst you could get is something spiritually neutral. Now, if your motive is to control someone, or to show off your journal as a spiritual status symbol, as the Corinthians did with the gift of tongues, then I cant guarantee anything. For that reason, it may be best to keep it to yourself to begin with, until you know your motives for doing it. 3. Having said that, it may also be wise to show your journalled words to someone you can trust, such as a pastor, or a home cell leader, or someone else whose council you trust. That's one more protection, in case you do get something wild, or you didn't really know your own motive in receiving a particular word. The following has been edited. Some parts that I feel were only for me, were deleted. Other parts that may have been stray words also were left out, so what is left should be edifying to all.
1/7/91 My son, I love you with an everlasting love. You are the apple of my eye. I have prepared so many good things for you -if only you knew, you would never again worry. * * * I have led you thus far and I am about to lead you into new things. If you will only wait and listen and study my word you can tap into many secrets. I have many things to show you that I delight for my children to know. If you will dedicate yourself to seek and to find these treasures you will soon know more of my goodness. Wait on me and rest in my love for you. Spend more time than you ever have at my feet. Don't worry about time "wasted". Continue digging into my word with the tools I have given you. Many treasures are yet to be found -many precious gems wait to be unearthed by your hand and laid in the foundation of the temple I am building. Yes, you are called to be one of the builders and stone layers, but wait and rest in my Spirit. Don't be hasty to set the new stones you find for they must be set into place carefully with the leading of my Holy Spirit. * * * My son, your place is a place of rest. Look to me always, rest in my love — my great unbounding love for you. You have just begun to see the magnificence of the great plan I have for my children. Rest, and look some more — gaze intently and you will see with greater clarity the things that I have prepared for those who love me. "Eye has not seen ...etc"
17/7/91 Note: This one came after I hadn't actually spent that much time at all in the Word, as the previous message told me to do, so it was short, and almost like a rebuke Rest and you will see, open your eyes and look intently and gaze into my Word. I have called you away to spend that time that you have at your disposal in my word. See the things I have laid out for you day by day and put them to practice.
21/7/91 What came after meditating on Ephesians 4:3-16 I have given gifts to all of my children- many "not of this fold" as some might say, yet in the same body. For there is only one body, one spirit, even as you are called in one hope of your calling. One Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and father of all who is above all, through all and in you all." Not all of my children can receive my gifts right now and for that reason, the body of Christ has not reached its full potential. My children are scattered and have lost the unity of the spirit. They are divided from one another and many have cut themselves off from my revelation —but not from my love. But they will come. My love will draw them. Many will be driven by circumstances and they will be drawn together. As they come together and rediscover the unity of the spirit, then the gifts will become manifest. Revelation will flow and the gifts of apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor and teacher will become visible in my body. To the extant that there is unity in the spirit, these gifts can operate in the body. They have already operated to a limited extant because there has been limited pockets of unity in the spirit throughout my body, but their authority has been limited to those who will receive them. As my servants the apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers begin to become fully operational, then the body can begin to move on from unity in the Spirit and come into the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God. Then you will see even greater heights of glory as you grow up into a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.
22/7/91 My son, you are my chosen for a very special purpose that will be revealed in due time. I have many plans for you —great plans— that will require preparation on your part. Continue in my Word, bask in it. It will soon be revealed to you what your part will be in the scheme of things. I am guiding your steps. When the cloud moves, you move with it. When it stays, stay put. This is also part of the preparation. I have arranged these circumstances you are in to sustain you just as I sustained Elijah at the brook of Cherith, and then trough the widow of Zaraphath. Rest in me; learn patience where you are; learn to stay still. I will move you in due time. And soon it will be time to move and time to act and accomplish great things, but for right now, rest in me —enjoy me— let me minister to your inner man. Just relax in me and enjoy me. I love you so much, more than you will ever know, but I want you to begin to know it more than you've ever known it until now. You are part of my plan, but more importantly, you are part of me, and I love you just for that.
29/7/91 My son, you are the apple of my eye and I love you with a love greater than you will ever know. Draw near to me and wait in my presence. You will see magnificent things there. I am about to break forth in revelation to my body and I want my children ready to receive —things that will astound your imagination— but you must be ready. Wait before me and drink of my love. You are special to me. Learn to wait on me continually in your spare time when your mind is not busy with the tasks I have given you. I will order your time so that you can both work and wait and devour the Word. Learn to control your mind so as to always be stayed on me. Revelation will flow much quicker when it is controlled this way. I have given this word to many and I will bring them into your path. You will soon learn to recognise those whom I've sent. Continue in my Word as before for I have yet more revelation from the Word. Study, meditate and wait on me says the Lord.
4/8/91 My son, I want you to realise your total dependence on me. It is I who gives you the strength. Lean on me always, never leave that place of rest. I will be your fortress and your strong comforter. My son, wallow in me. Soak in me — soak up my love, my presence, my character. Allow your whole life to be one of abiding —resting — leaning on me. Lean not to your own understanding but acknowledge me. Refer to me in everything and spend time in my presence until you ?have the answer. You are valuable to me and I have great plans for you. When you hear the word "great" don't take it for granted. When I say "great" I do mean GREAT. My word is full of superlatives that you too often brush over because there are so many, but I mean every one of them. You are loved by me because you are my pearl of great price. I have invested a lot in you because I love you. Your place in me — your abiding in my love — will confirm the glory I am about to shower on you. You are loved by me and you are my pearl of great price. Abide in that love, sing and rejoice in that love and you will know my glory. * * * My son, you have come a hard long way, but it is the way I have led you to come. You have been faithful to me and that is what has sustained you. I have never let you down, although many times you lost hope in man's ways. You made mistakes along the way but my hand has guided you throughout. Now I am about to make sense of the seeming "nonsense" of your life. Many have misunderstood you — yes, you have even misunderstood yourself. Many turns I have led you to take have mystified many but I am about to make it all clear. Just take your hands off and I will steer you to greater heights and greater freedom. You will be amazed at what I am about to do through you. Sit back and relax in me and you will see.
22/8/91 0:11 My son, the storm clouds are now forming. It will soon be time to act. I want you ready when that time comes (and it will come sooner than you think) —to be ready and obedient. Be diligent to perceive the signs. ... Things that you never expected are taking place —things that you would have never thought possible. These things are of me and they are the preliminaries leading up to some major events —events that were prophesied by my servants long ago. I am setting the stage for my revival which will sweep the land. Look and behold for in these events you will see the confirmation of what I am speaking to your heart. You be ready to move and act on my leading in your heart. Don't be afraid, for as I told my disciples long ago, I am with you, I will never leave you or forsake you. That is why it is important to continue to be conscious of my presence with you by spending time resting (relaxing) in me. Continue in that. Continue disciplining your mind to be stayed on me. Don't be discouraged by failure because even that can be changed into a step forward. Don't regret your mistakes for I am your redeemer and I can redeem even those. You just redeem the time I have given you, and remain before me. Continue steadfast in my presence listening and keeping an eye on my time pieces. You are my chosen for a great purpose which is about to be revealed. Stay before me and soon you will know my master plan. Don't be afraid but keep on looking to me. I am your sufficiency and your strength. Look to me for everything. I will make it plain what it is you are to do. Just continue before me. That is your source of strength and your comfort. I am your all in all. Learn to live there, sleeping in the temple as Samuel did. I came to him in his sleep and that is where he learned to hear my voice. He then afterward taught others how to listen to me when he started the school of the prophets. Remain before me and learn of me. You will have sufficient strength when the time comes to do the duties I call you to.
23/8/91 0:20 I am about to move and shake Heaven and Earth. You will see my glory as it comes down. Stand still and see; watch the nations of the Earth; watch my instruments of my glory, my people. It is time to see and behold the wonders foretold from ages past. I am about to move. You are part of my plan —yea everyone who will yield to me will have a part. Wait before me and watch for my glory for I will shake Heaven and Earth, and that which is holy and of me will stand. Watch and pray that you fall not into temptation, for many will turn away. Many whose footing is not sure; many whose foundation is not of me says the Lord. Look to me and be built up in my strength. Yes, look to me for I am your source. My strength is the only thing that will get you through the times that are ahead. If you rely on my strength, things will be easy, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Rest in me. Rest and you will sleep through a storm.
1/9/91 0:45 I delight in you my son, I really think a lot of you. I enjoy it when you come to me like this. I wish you would do it more often. I have a lot to tell you. I really love you and I do enjoy communing with you. Practice listening to my voice — practice makes perfect. Continue in me and learn to receive the many wonderful things I have for you. Look to me for everything. I have everything you need right here. Everything you will ever need. If you will listen to my voice and act on it, I will lead you to the right place at the right time. Don't worry about the future. It's in my hands. Don't worry about what you're going to eat. You'll have plenty. You'll never lose weight because of not enough food. You'll have to control your own appetite for that. If you obey me, you will always be in a position of having to control your appetite. Practice listening to my voice daily — in your idle moments — rest in me as you have been learning to do. Rest in me and enjoy me. Your place in me is your security. Learn to live there always. I am your strong tower.
1/9/91 23:50 My son, don't worry about what's to happen. All things are in my hands. all you have to do is wait before me. Look to me. Gaze into my love. Look into my eyes and see the springs of living water. Breath deeply of me. Bask in my presence and enjoy being with me, for I certainly enjoy you. I like it when you wait before me. I love to show you new things. Look to me daily and seek out my wisdom. look to me for what's to come. Receive the strength you will need. As you do so, you are gaining in strength. You are developing in your ability to follow closely step by step. You are developing in many things. Clarity is coming little by little. The fog is lifting and as you stand before me, you will soon see all things clearly. Stand before me and continue to gaze. Seek out my wisdom and look to me daily. My Word has the answers to your heart's desire. Read it and gain a new perspective. Look to me and receive says the Lord.
1/10/91 My son, you are the apple of my eye. You are my beloved son. I am pleased with you. Keep following closely after me. Look to me for everything. Stay in the attitude of listening and looking to me. Keep your spirit stirred up. You have slipped and failed some but that's no reason not to expect good things to come. Pick right up where you left off and keep going on as if nothing ever happened. That's what my forgiveness is for. My son took all the punishment for your failures and shortcomings. You just move right on and take full advantage of my son's suffering on your behalf. That's the way to victory. Any other way leaves the door open to the devil. Many of my servants have fallen because of this very thing. Just plug along. Keep going in the right direction without turning back for anything. Don't look back. Once you've put your hand to the plough, look at the mark. Do not look at the straightness or the crookedness of the furrow you have ploughed. Look only to me. I will see to the other things. Move ahead into the things I have for you. Keep on truckin'. I have many things for you up ahead. Keep moving forward. Keep digging deeper into me —keep looking into my face. Keep listening for my voice. Keep on stretching your spiritual antennae as far as it will go. As you do, it will stretch farther than it has before. Keep digging for precious gems. Keep on reaching for new revelations of myself. As you gaze into my beauty, the other distractions will fade away. Victory will come easier. You will know my power over the sins you have easily fallen for. Keep looking deeper and deeper into my character and you will absorb it into your being. Allow my presence to dispel any remaining fears and all the barriers to full revelation will fall away. You will soon see as you have never seen before.
25/10/91 0:30 My son, Receive from me. Receive what I have to give, the many things I have to shower on you. For I have many things to give you if you will only learn to receive. Begin learning to receive and you will be surprised of all the things I have for you. For I love you more than you know. My love for you expands the bounds of imagination. When you learn to receive, you will begin to to probe the depths of my love for you. My son, It is time you learned to receive from me on a daily basis. Don't just pray away, but pray expecting something. Pray with the goal to expand your spiritual insight and your spiritual capacity. You are now learning how to do it, but I want you to put it to use on a consistent basis. Begin to do this, and you will be amazed at what I have for you, the depth of the riches in the heavenly places that await you. You are growing day by day. You are reaching places you have never reached before. You are coming to new things and I have yet more. I want you to begin to receive them at an ever increasingly accelerated rate. Time is getting short and you have a lot to do. You need to be ready for each step and you can only be ready as you learn to receive from me. Give us this day our daily bread — receive your daily bread from me. and you will soon see the wonderful greatness of my glory that is to be manifest in these last days, even as it was prophesied by all my servants of old. Be humble before me even as my servant moses was humble. Be humble before me and I will lead you into those things. Be humble before me and receive those things from my mouth, and from my hands. Rest in me. Rest only in me. Depend on me. Relax in me. Be found in me only. Dig deeper into me. Desire me with all your heart and follow through and you will be richly rewarded and so will many others. Strip away those things that keep you from me. come before me with a clean heart. Come in worship and I will be there. I will be there to meet you at your point of need. I will be there to bless and to pour out my love on you in ways you have never imagined before.
27/10/91 24:00 My son, just keep on forging ahead and receiving further revelation from me. Keep on going. As I said before, "keep on truckin'." That not only goes for when you've fallen and pick yourself up again, but when you are still on your feet, and are still recovering from a new revelation. Just look to me because that is where it will all come together. Just look to me and keep running with the vision. Don't let anything stop you —even a revelation or a Word. Look to me, my son. Look to me in these days that lie ahead when things may look gloomy on the surface. Look to me and you will see that it is really a for-runner of glory. Look to me always and see my light in the midst of darkness. That light will shine brighter and brighter as the days go by. As you look, you will see clearer and clearer. Look, and gaze into that light. Look into my face. Look and see the things I have in store for you. they are to be found in me. They are not with, me, they are in me. You are in me. Take your place in me and you will be an extension of my hand as I stretch it forth to heal the nations. you are part of my answer. You are in Christ and Don't forget that you are in Christ and Christ is in me. Together we are a partnership. Find your security in me. Not in your creature comforts. Your support is from the unseen realm. Your livelihood is not where the eye can see it. Your place of security is in me. Not in familiar surroundings. Not in what you are used to seeing. Not in what you expect to naturally come forth. It is in me. Look to me daily. I am your support. I don't have your support, I am your support. 14/12/91 My son, Keep looking to me. Look to me for the strength to keep looking to me. Keep abiding and looking to me steadfastly and you will see that you will not tire in that position. When all else looks confusing, look again into my face. Look and abide in that position of looking. No, don't even take your gaze off me, for I am the one who is your source of day to day, moment by moment existence. You are now learning to really rely on me like you never have before. Look, and you will know the experience of breaking through like you never have before. Breakthrough will come. Just wait. Look to me. Look intently into my face. Look into my loving eyes. Look and be refreshed. Look and be purified. Look into my face, for there is where you will find your strength, and preparation. It is there that you will find the coming ways of my spirit. —the winds that are about to blow, yea, that are even now blowing and have been blowing for some years now, but will begin blowing with increasing strength. Learn about those winds as you look into my face. Do what you have been doing, but do it with greater fervour. Know that there is a purpose to every thing I lead you to do. Be faithful to the nudge of my spirit. Be faithful and you will be greatly rewarded. Look to me and search for new ways. Search with everything you have, and you will be greatly rewarded. You will catch the wind and it will blow you to where I would have you go. Search as one who has lost their most valuable possession. They turn their house upside down until they have found it. Seek and you will find. Knock and the door shall be opened unto you. Ask from the depth of your heart, with all your strength. Ask and look intently. You will soon receive all you are looking for and much more. Much much more.
24/1/92 23:11 Son, you are going through a transition period. You are learning many things that it would have taken years to learn by any other means. You have come a long way, farther in fact than you think, but you have farther yet to go. Don't think of knowledge and ability the way way you use to think of it or measure, or compare. This is a totally new realm. Think only of my ability, and my resources. Don't think in terms of what you can do, or what you have accomplished. Think only of whether I can do it. If I can do it, I can do it through you. Don't ever doubt my ability. As I was with Moses, so will I be with you. That's what I told Joshua. With you it's different because not only with you but I'm IN you. You can therefore expect greater things than Moses ever saw. You have a relationship with me that Moses never had. Moses certainly enjoyed what he had. That's why he lived so long. He would have gone farther if he could have, and I had let him, but he had to stop. He could only go so far. He longed to see the things you see, and hear the things you hear. That was his heart's desire. But he had to settle for being a channel through whom I could later bring about my full salvation plan to earth so that others could go into the regions beyond, into the very Holy of Holies and live there. You are at that place. You don't need to go up into a mountain or into a tent to find me. You can come into my presence right where you are and come even closer than Moses ever did. Come and receive all the grace you'll need. Come and relax and bask in My presence. Just sit there and enjoy it. Don't keep looking at your watch, just relax. You have all the time in the world. Do it by faith and I will be there. I will see to it that you get what you need.
30/1/92 00:50 My son, keep looking to me in this hour. Look to me as never before. Look into my brightness, and behold the glory of my presence. As you look, you will be refreshed. Sorrow will be turned to joy. Old things will be made new. Strength will arise and new vigour will flow through your veins. A new freshness will come forth that you have never known before. Yea, a refreshing that will not only brighten your soul but will be a source of refreshment for all who come into contact with you. They will be like waves of living water. Not just a fountain, but waves, high 10 foot waves will role in with refreshing to meet the needs of the weary souls around you. Learn to role with the waves of my Spirit. Learn to frolic and surf in them. Take the wind in your sail and learn to glide on the crest of each incoming wave of my Spirit. Live in my Spirit. Learn to abide there daily. Learn to spend your whole day in my presence. Not in solemn religious prayer, but joying in me the whole day as you go about your service for the kingdom. Go in that strength, and you will accomplish much more than you thought could ever be accomplished. Yes, more than even your fertile imagination could come up with! Move along in the things I have for you. Move ahead, and pierce into the outer limits of human security — those man made barriers. Yes, just go ahead at full speed, riding on my waves. Moving in my power, my mighty power that pushes everything out of its way as it moves. Move on with vigour, and see the strongholds collapse as you speak MY WORD. Just go in this, MY strength, and MY courage. Quit worrying what people think. Just do it. Go for it! My love is with you. My strength, and my power. My Holy Spirit, that powerful force that shakes kingdoms to their very foundations is your driving force. You will see kingdoms quake to their very foundation, till there is nothing left. You will see things happen that you would have never thought possible — not even now with your expanded consciousness. I have so much more that people have never credited me for. I have so much more that not even the most fertile imagination has even come close to dreaming up. You just watch, and I'll surprise the lot of them. I am going to do things in your day that you wouldn't believe if it were told you. Hallelujah! I have so much more, that you are just beginning to break the surface. My wisdom is so immense, so deep, wide, so massive, that you haven't even begun to fathom even the outer surface of it. I am inviting you to come and experience it for yourself. Just step in and view the magnificence of it all. Just keep stepping in further and further into the depth of what I have. You can never fathom the depth of it it is so deep. Even if you were to keep it up for all eternity. Just keep on plunging in. Each discovery will bring such delight you have never even experienced. Oh! I have so much, it just excites me to think how you are going to react to it! I'm looking forward to you getting in on more of this. You are going to have a great time! Just step in and see. It is wonderful beyond words to express. If this excites me, just think how it's going to affect you! Oh! you of little faith! Come on in and join the fun! My people are so far from what I have for them. Oh! if they only knew what they are missing. Oh! if they only knew! Eye has not seen nor ear heard what I have for those who love me, and go all out to receive all I have. You, my son, are to go and show them. Show them first hand. If they won't come, take it to them! Show them those things that I have for them, that they've been missing. You take these lovely presents, all these goodies, and go, and scatter them abroad, to who ever will take them. Tell them there's more where they came from. Then you come back and get another arm load, and go right back and just give them out. Just give them, even throw them if you have to. I want my people to know what's in store for them. I want them to know what they can have if they only start to dig in to what I have for them. You go and bring them in. Grab them by the hand and drag them if you have to. Bring them into my presence so they will know My love. I do have so much for every one of my children. For everyone who will call on My Name, I have far more than the richest fancy can even touch!
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